Papers and Presentations

I presented a paper today at a grad conference in our department. I was surprised at how many people we drew from other universities - and very impressed. My panel was titled Bahktinian Laughter. I think that my paper went well - at least, that is what a couple of people in the tiny audience indicated. They laughed at the right moments. I always worry when I present children's literature at locations where people don't work with children's literature. You just never know how they will react. There are those people out there who think that issues related to children are somehow lesser, and thus unworthy of serious study. I'm really glad none of them were there, or, if they were, that they didn't make their presence known.

As for my co-presenters....the one from my university - and in the literature side of the program - gave a fascinating talk about a selection of early modern woodcuts/rogue pamphlet images. Very Engaging.

The other presenter - well, he wasn't so great. In fact, I thought he didn't thoroughly understand the theory he was playing with and some of his gross generalizations were offensive. He set up what I think is a false dichotomy, equating religion/religious views with fundamentalism. Well, equate is probably the wrong word. What he did was set up this image of Jesus as someone who appreciates humor, and the way that can help us read parables. What bothered me was that he set up academics, on one side, as those who need to teach fundamentalists how to read scripture properly (i.e., how he reads it).

First of all, I hate it when people assume that all academics are located on one end of the political spectrum. I hate the propensity for GroupThink. And I see it here a lot. Well, actually I hear it a lot.

But aside all of that, he just didn't convince me with his theoretical approach. And the other member of our panel somewhat called him on it during the Q&A.

Overall, it went well. Sadly, though, my panel was scheduled at the same time as the main comp/rhet panel, so I couldn't see my people present! And that afternoon, I had to work at the library, so I couldn't go to the other comp/rhet affair either.

Evaluation

Today was the site visit at my practicum site. I was really nervous - its been weighing on my mind all week. I was told when I started the project that there was no expectation that I would be able to finish it - my job was to get the project started.

Nevertheless, the fact that it isn't finished - and knowing how much work still needs to be done - left me feeling a little shaky about how the site visit and evaluation of my work would go.

Thankfully, it went very well. And now I'm at that point where I feel so relieved that I don't feel like working on anything at all.

Of course, I still haven't heard about my dissertation proposal draft...

The Birthday That Wasn't

I'd like to say that I've spent the past week celebrating my birthday (4/11), but I've been too busy working. On that blessed day last week, I spent 14 - yes, 14- hours on campus. I went in early to teach, worked on my projects most of the afternoon, and then worked a later than normal writing center shift because I didn't feel as if I could leave the students who needed help, even though it was past my shift.

Then, I get home, and hear my sister on my voicemail, singing badly and laughing about how I must be out partying. If only that were true.

I've been working my ass off this past week trying to finish up my web page project for the library. I've put in a lot of time and work into this, and it probably is just fine, but I am really worried - no, obsessed- that it isn't good enough. I feel like I've been working really slow, and I hope that doesn't effect my evaluation very much. I'm not sure, though, because I don't have anything to base the time-issue on.

Haven't yet heard back about the dissertation proposal. This is probably the locus of my stress. No news is good news, right???

The Beginning of the Long Haul

Well, not too long, I hope.

Today I turned in the first draft (and it was a very drafty draft) of my dissertation proposal. My advisor wants me to have a finished proposal and proposal defense by the end of the semester. That is very few weeks away. I'll admit it, I'm nervous. Probably more than I should be.

But it feels great to have a draft completed. I know that I have the theoretical approach down - well, at least I think I do - but my research questions aren't as well-formed as I would like. I think that my problem is that I want to rush full speed ahead without taking the time to get the beginning "right"

About all of those books...

...should I read Freedom From Fear, review a little deCerteau, or re-read a favorite novel? I bet you can guess what I want to do.

Is it bad that I wish for storms?

Not that I want harm to come to anyone or anything, but I really wish that we would have a real storm.

Back in March, I wrote this to a friend after being asked about the weather:

It is suppose to snow this evening, and we've had a high wind advisory all day. Of course, that is better than the Tornado advisories to the south of us. We do get the occasional tornado and funnel cloud around here. I can recall quite a few times growing up when we all headed to the basement because the sirens had sounded. I always wanted to stay outside and watch the storm. I love storms - the way the colour of the sky changes, the lightning, the wind, watching the rain change directions as the clouds rush through the sky. Right now, I can hear the wind pushing against the windows as my father's sets of wind chimes seem to rage outside, occasionally accompanied by thunder and lightning that make the ground beneath us shake. It is really amazing! If it weren't so cold right now, I would go outside to watch it.


I want that right now. Is that so wrong? My dad likes to watch the rain - that's probably where I get it from. He will sit on the porch and watch, or he will open the garage door and sit in a folding lawn chair near that place where the ground ceases to be dry. He takes a glass of iced tea and sits there, watching,sometimes until the storm stops. I use to love sitting there with my dad, silent, listening to the rain and the wind, watching the lightning and waiting for the thunder.

Too Many Books???

Is it possible to have too many books? Normally I wouldn't even consider such a question, but this evening, as I was rearranging and assessing the mass of books on my shelves, I realized how many of them I haven't had time either to read or to read well. This makes me sad. Maybe I shouldn't buy so many books.

That's probably the issue.

But I always think that I will have time to get to them. Grad school really screws up my reading time. Obviously, I read a lot, but I don't have as much reading freedom. My mind doesn't get to jump from genre to genre, or from topic to topic, like it used to.


Times like these make me wish I had a regular office job again. Especially since I've never felt as if I needed school/university to have a life of the mind. I wasn't even the good student type - ever!

Teaching Ideas

One of the results of my recent conference going is that I gathered all of these new and interesting teaching ideas. So why am I looking at PAships - work where I wouldn't be teaching, wouldn't have my own classroom. I need to get these things down on paper as soon I have a chance so that I don't forget about them over approx. two years of project assistanship.

But I am impatient to put these ideas into action.